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Why Dare to Hope in a World Like This?

5/27/2015

3 Comments

 
          Why hope in a world so filled with disappointment, where cynicism runs rampant, and there’s such a gap between dreamers and doers, between idealism and practicality? Why bother when there will always be people who are more qualified, more connected, and more talented standing right between you and the things you want? Why feed those desires when they cost too much, they’re too far away, or you have to jump through too many hoops to get to where you want to be? When it takes so much time, so much effort, and so much sheer luck?

            Believe it or not, these aren’t just rhetorical questions. There’s an answer to why we need to keep hoping, keep trying, and keep dreaming. It’s because hope nurtures hope and feeds determination. It has this effect on others, of course. Your hope can inspire your friend to hope; your friend’s hope—nurtured by your own—can inspire another, and on and on until the world is inspired. Of course that’s possible. But it also works within oneself.

            When I was in high school, I received a brochure in the mail telling me of a great opportunity. It was a summer program at Cambridge, and it was my first real invitation to dream of England with a realistic hope of getting there. My parents said that I could go if we had the money, but it turned out we didn’t. Still, a spark had ignited, and it wouldn’t be snuffed out so easily.

            Later in high school, I went through a bit of a National Treasure phase, I guess you’d call it. Basically, I spent my time online reading through treasure hunting forums and investigating conspiracy theories. I was convinced I knew where to look for an ancient Templar treasure in the western United States. My dad and I even planned a theoretical treasure hunting road trip, which, for a while, I believed we might actually take, though we never did.

            When the spring of senior year rolled around, another road trip was proposed, this time with my friends from school. Victoria and I spent hours on the phone discussing a spring break trip to Florida. I collaged the front of a composition notebook with beach pictures and used it to plan our route, our budget, and everything. But…that trip didn’t happen either. Neither did my uncle’s proposed trip to Honduras. He was going to take me, but a coup d’état or something equally unpredictable got in the way.

            You’d think I’d be discouraged with all the false starts and misplaced wishes. You’d think those once consuming and lovely dreams lying in pieces on the floor would deter me from getting my hopes up again. But they didn’t. The broken pieces came together to form a more colorful mosaic, and I grew to become more determined than ever to see the world, and to achieve the countless other things I hoped for. Preparation for the derailed Honduras trip led me to the post office, where I stood in line to obtain my passport. And look where that small step has taken me. Oh, and those road trip plans that never came to fruition? Well, I still haven’t found any treasure, but I’ve been to both Florida AND the western US with the greatest friends I could ever imagine. And I don’t have to tell you how my dreams to study in England eventually came true…I probably talk about that one enough. ;)

            The point is, a little hope doesn’t have to be crushed when faced with initial disappointment. It can grow, until it’s too big to be defeated. Just because your plans don’t turn out the way you want the first time, doesn’t mean you’ll never get what you’ve been yearning for. It just may take some time, and it may look different than you imagined when you do get it. And chances are, it’ll be even better. Maybe because it’s different and unexpected. Maybe because you can appreciate it more after not getting it originally. And maybe because it’s more satisfying knowing you could’ve given up, but you didn’t. You kept hoping.

            My pastor said something very wise several Sundays ago. He said that the difference between wishing and hoping is action. You can wish for things, but you can rarely get them without hope, without action, without trying. After a setback or disappointment in life, it’s easier to wish things had worked out than to hope that they still can. But wishing won’t get you too far. You’ve got to hang on to that hope, as battered and crushed as it can get sometimes, because that’s what will see you through. Hope nurtures hope and feeds determination, but it requires action.

And I guess that’s the next step, isn’t it? 



_____________________________________________________________________________________________________________

Now, don't we all feel better after a heaping helping of cheese? This is Anna Beth, by the way. I know it's not Thursday, but I had something that was ready to post. And isn't the trend this week posting on days that aren't your own? ;)

3 Comments

Perspective

5/23/2015

3 Comments

 
Today I haven’t quite felt myself. I’m hollow, missing a piece of me that makes me me. There’s been times of laughter and joy and a sense of being carefree, but throughout the entire day, I have felt the heavy weight of gravity on my shoulders and the burden of being mortal.

I saw someone have a heart attack yesterday.

It was shocking. At the time, myself and others sprang into action, doing all we could – as small as holding doors and as large as restarting a heart – to try to save someone we care about.

I’ve had to call 911 for my Dad after he collapsed due to an accidental chemical inhalation. I’ve driven my Mom to the ER after she suffered a concussion after tripping and falling on concrete. I’ve been through a few late night ER visits for my sister and myself with sickness, broken bones, and aches. All of these instances had several minutes to accumulate the tension, the concern, the strength needed to do what I needed to do.

This was so sudden. I saw my friend’s head hit the floor, and to me – in my head – I saw my Dad collapsed.

It was the worst feeling in the world.

For the good in this, my friend appears to be doing ok. I stayed in the ER for a few hours last night waiting for news with his family and some other friends. I haven’t gotten an update today, but as far as I know, he is expected to make a full recovery. (For privacy reasons, I’m not going to disclose any information about my friend on this blog, other than he/she is a friend.)

I know God was there in this. The hospital and emergency personnel have said multiple times that if my friend had been alone today when he had the heart attack, even just for a few minutes, he wouldn’t still be here. If everyone hadn’t done all they did starting at that instant, he would be dead. The timing of everything couldn’t have been more perfect, except of course for it not happening. It was all a miracle from God.

If I was ever unsure about miracles before, I certainly have no doubts now.

I’ve been so exhausted from just living today. I’ve gone through various chores and errands I needed to do almost robotically: Wake up early, take my car for an oil change, take care of my dog, try to see Mark for a few minutes at yet another hospital, make dinner, watch tv, collapse into a deep sleep nap after everything… All the while, I’m thinking:

Or rather, I’m not. I’m still numb.

Life certainly seems different today than it did 24 hours ago.

Welcome to being human, Amber.
3 Comments

I finally made a video...

5/21/2015

6 Comments

 
.......BUTTTTTTT it's not that great. I recorded the narration, but then I didn't know what I wanted to do with it, so it's kinda random. Oh well. Let me know what you think.
6 Comments

Virtually All Virtually together

5/20/2015

0 Comments

 
Picture
We're just missing Amy!
0 Comments

Here comes the bride...

5/19/2015

4 Comments

 
Hello from election day! No, it's not Friday, but Rachael didn't post on her day either. Maybe this can be our next unofficial theme for the week? Don't worry about what day it is, just post whenever you feel like it!

Anyways, I do have a legitimate excuse for not posting this time (the last few it's literally just been that I forgot, lol). Instead of writing up a blog, I was sitting in a car on an 8 hour marathon drive to Florida! A couple of Jake's (and my) friends got married in Destin this weekend, so we roadtripped it down and back. I couldn't really take off work, so we left right after and met some other friends in Bowling Green to ride with them. We ended up getting to the hotel around 2 a.m., which was at least better than we thought- we were imagining 4 or 5.

As I'm sure you can imagine, the weekend was a little bit rushed, what with spending about 20 hours of it in a car after everything was said and done. But it was definitely worth it. We went to the beach after getting a few hours of sleep Saturday morning (girls and boys separated, of course, because the bride and groom weren't allowed to see each other). It was cloudy, and I applied sunscreen twice, so no sunburn! Then we spent several hours showering and everyone getting ready. I wasn't a bridesmaid or anything, but Jake was a groomsmen, so I ended up hanging out with the bridal party and helping to get table pieces where they needed to be and running whatever errands I could to help out. Whitney (the bride) looked beautiful in her dress, of course, and the wedding itself was gorgeous. It took place out on the sand before we moved up to the deck for the reception. Since it was a destination wedding, there were probably less than 50 people total. We all tried not to cry during the vows, then watched the wedding party take pictures (with varying degrees of seriousness) on the beach before enjoying the delicious food and crazy fun dancing of the reception. By the time that was over, everyone was exhausted from the nonstop dancing and jumping around, and it was time to get some sleep before another marathon drive back to Kentucky.

All said and done, I got home around 10, just in time to go to bed for work in the morning. Today, happily, is election day, so I get an extra day to sleep in before the rest of the week.

So it was a very busy weekend, with lots of driving (Alabama is so big, guys. Why does it have to be SO stinkin' big?), but the ceremony was beautiful, I am so so happy for Whitney and Jonathan, and I can't wait for the next one. Admittedly, that will probably be mine, so my motives are a little skewed. But, the moral of this story is that I love weddings. So you guys better get on it. I need more excuses to dress up and cry and dance til I drop.

Love,

Sara
4 Comments

Hopefully everything will work out

5/17/2015

4 Comments

 
Hi guys! I know it's not Wednesday, the day kinda assigned to me, but I want to give you an update with what's happening to me. And also I'm kinda lonely and feel the need to communicate :/
I finally started the process of kinda moving to NY--I got a one-way plane ticket that landed me here last Friday and booked a hostel for a week. I told myself that I would give myself about a week--2 weeks top--to secure a job, if not start working, and an extra week to find a place to rent. If I didn't, I would simply go back to KY and search for a job around Nashville because I didn't want to deplete my savings for nothing.
Ideally, I would get a job offer from Ken and Isaac at KaufmanFranco and would spend the week looking for a safe and clean place to stay. Good news for me, Isaac emailed me back almost immediately and asked if I would come in so we could talk. That talk happened today, and it seems like they would like to hire me, but that would mean firing the girl who has been in that position for the last couple months. It's an iffy position to be in--I still may not get the job, and if I do, I won't hear anything for at least a week. 

I gotta be honest--I'm nervous. Or is anxious a better word?

In order for me to stay in NY, I need a job, in order to get a job, I have to commit a lot of time, effort, and money because I have a waaaayyy better chance of getting an interview (not even a job, just an interview) if I'm already here, and I have limited resources.


All in all, I've been asking myself, "is this all worth it?"

I'm here alone, miss John terribly because I don't know when I'll see him next, stressed about money--will I have enough to afford a clean place, not full with bedbugs, cockroaches, or other pests?, I can only afford a place like that if I have a roommate, but will I find one who's clean, not creepy, and not have to share a single bathroom with 4 other people? Will I be conned out of $3,000 because I trusted the wrong people?
Do I even want to live here anymore? Because right now, I feel like I'm sacrificing a lot more than any potential return.

*Sigh* I'm sorry this post is such a downer, but I really needed to get it off my chest.

And also, John just needs a shout-out because he's been super supportive with whatever I choose--if I stay in NY, he'll visit me, if I go back to KY, great! Because it's only a 5-hr drive from where he'll be stationed in Alabama and he'll be visiting his mom anyway, do I need a place to stay? His place is always open. We've been in constant communication since, well, since the night we met honestly. Guys, like I really really like him--dare I write 'love'? After all, the internet is forever--but yes, I love John and I'm really glad we're together. Ugh, this feels so cheesy, but just talking--typing?--about him makes me feel better. He spoils me and sets the bar higher than my previous standards for any other guy that might come along.

Hopefully, I'll look back at this post in a couple weeks and ask myself why I was so worried. Even if it doesn't work out here in NY, then at least I can say I tried.


4 Comments

Camping!

5/10/2015

3 Comments

 
3 Comments

The Wild Rovers

5/7/2015

5 Comments

 
Hello from a night out at the pub! I was going to try to edit a video...maybe...but then a couple of French girls staying in our room at the hostel asked if we wanted to go to the pub with them. So Jill and I, and our new awesome friend Rebecca (from Canada) joined them for a lovely time at a big, warmly lit pub near Trinity College. There were musicians playing traditional Irish songs (and not "Benny and the Jets" like Rebecca requested. lol!), and there was river dancing. This guy and girl were amazing, and they danced right in the middle of the room. Our table was next to where the band was playing, so right in the middle of the action. It was a great night. I had a delicious piece of chocolate cake for dinner (after being full from our new favorite Chinese place at lunch), and Jill had a pint of Guinness! I tried it, but found it to be rather disgusting. Oh well.
The best part wasn't the Guinness or the cake or the dancing, though. The best part was that we were with friends. Albeit fairly new friends, friends we won't likely see again after this week, but friends for the moment, and that's good enough. Earlier in our stay here, we went to a much smaller, much quieter pub with some Germans we'd met. One of them, upon entering, declared to us that it looked a bit boring, which wasn't incorrect. But an Irishman at the bar turned to her and said that you have to make your own fun, and enjoy the people you're with. I think that's the first lesson learned here in Dublin's fair city. It doesn't matter so much where you are, as long as you have the right people beside you. When you're as transient as Jill and I have been recently, the "right people" might seem hard to find. But they're actually all around. You just have to open your eyes, and step out of your room occasionally. At first, I didn't imagine that we'd make friends at the hostel, or that there was much of a point in it, since these are just other travelers, bound to leave as quickly as they come. It isn't like we'd have real friends IN DUBLIN. I didn't put that much thought into it. But then I was sitting on the steps one night after skyping my parents, and German boy sat down and started talking. Before the night was over, there were nine of us, sitting on the steps, clogging up the hallway, asking silly questions. Before the week was over, Jill and I were touring St. Patrick's Cathedral with a girl from Wisconsin. We were meeting Brazilians and Norwegians and Africans after worshiping alongside them at a church on Sunday morning.  We were sharing chicken nuggets, candy bars, and travel stories with a nineteen-year-old on a solo trip around Europe before starting university. If these aren't the right people, who are? In the end, it doesn't matter how long they stick around. It's better to have a friend for a moment and make memories to last a  lifetime. 

=====================================================================================

Then again, you can't get much better than friends who've been around forever and love you to the moon and back. Which is why I'm so excited to let you guys know that Shelby will be coming to visit us in our BRAND NEW FLAT in Dublin! We move in this weekend, and then she's coming to visit next weekend, hopefully with a suitcase of Kraft mac n cheese (if you watch the video I put on our channel earlier today, you'll understand our struggle)! The adventure just gets better and better...except for the whole 'we don't really have jobs yet' thing. Uhhh....we'll work on that....

ANYWAY, speaking of our Youtube channel, we've been trying to make more videos recently, and there's still a LOT that I need to edit. But I want to do a Q&A video for next Thursday, so PLEASE send me questions. Anything you're dying to know about our lives since we've left the States, about Dublin, about hostels or travel, etc. Ask away! 

Thanks a million!
Anna Beth
5 Comments

Video Time

5/6/2015

1 Comment

 
I didn't post yesterday because Anna Beth h̶a̶d̶ ̶m̶e̶ ̶l̶o̶c̶k̶e̶d̶ ̶u̶p̶ ̶i̶n̶ ̶t̶h̶e̶ ̶k̶i̶t̶c̶h̶e̶n̶ ̶b̶a̶s̶e̶m̶e̶n̶t̶ ̶t̶a̶l̶k̶i̶n̶g̶ ̶a̶b̶o̶u̶t̶ ̶w̶e̶b̶s̶e̶r̶i̶e̶s̶ ̶a̶d̶a̶p̶t̶a̶t̶i̶o̶n̶s̶ and I were having a discussion on webseries adaptations and I ran out of time to finish what I was making.

Hello from the still the same hostel in Dublin. 
*sigh*  We move into our new place on Sunday, and that day can't come fast enough.
I like hostels and I like meeting some of the people in hostels (and I like sometimes gettting free food and stuff from people leaving the hostel that don't want to take it with them) but I can't wait to be able to have a room to myself (not counting AB) and multple rooms and A PLACE TO DO LAUNDRY. Yeah, it's been decided Sunday is basically going to be composed of doing laundry, attempting to make macaroni and cheese (Ireland doesn't have kraft dinner, and that is a very sad thing), rolling around on our new floor because we can, and being cozy in front of the new fire place.
Oh yeah, we actually made friends. Granted, they aren't friends that are sticking around, but still. We went to a pub with some germans and went to St. Patrick's Cathedral with a girl from Wisconsin who was studying abroad in Spain and met a cool girl from Canada who gave us a jacket she didn't want anymore and had a little party on the stairs with a bunch of people where we just asked each other random questions.

In other news, I have editing software that actually works now. In unfortunate news, I couldn't really think of anything creative to do with it. It's hard for me to edit things without a script to work to and I couldn't really think up a good thoughts from places, so instead, here's just a bunch of clips from the two weeks AB and I spent in UK.


At some point I plan doing a blog post on museums and maybe another one on a certain exhibition at Tate Modern in London. And for some reason Anna Beth wants me to do a blog post on moths. But those'll have to wait. 


Best Wishes,
Jill
1 Comment

It's Still Technically Saturday...

5/2/2015

0 Comments

 
...for another 54 minutes here, at least. Three important things:

1) I loved reading all of your Q&As! :) And, no, Sara: it's still stealing unless you ask. I'm going to presume you asked me in your head, so the fact that I'm a mind-reader means that I say yes to your asking, and you can use the format. :P

2) Mark and I just had a wonderful day together. We went to Caesar's Creek State Park and hiked to Horseshoe Falls, then ate at a Skyline Chili, then went to IKEA (I know! Mark's the best), and then came back to my place and watched the Kentucky Derby and Parks and Recreation. Hence, why this blog is short.

3) I love you guys. Just wanted you to know. :)

Amber

PS: I'm on a Parks & Rec kick right now, so here's my favorite song from the show. :) I'll always love you, Li'l Sebastian. You are the greatest miniature horse of all time.

(And btw, if you haven't watched Parks yet, you should. Really. You should. :D )

"5000 Candles in the Wind" - Mouse Rat

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