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Food for Thought

6/27/2015

5 Comments

 
So, recently I watched this Vlogbrothers video https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=lfchH1a6XMU in which Hank shared fifteen (though at my count 14) of his favorite feelings in the world. And they were interesting, and I agreed with him, but at the end of the video he said this:

“John, I'm gonna be honest, I found this video surprisingly hard to make. Even in a little corner of the internet that we inhabit that is a very open and honest and authentic place. It was difficult to just share things that I like. I don't know why. If it's self-consciousness or if it's like I'm afraid that I'm bragging that I, like, enjoy things in my life, which is, why would you feel that way? I don't know. Apparently it's more fun to complain than to appreciate but probably not better for a person or the world in the long term.”

This has been nagging at me for a while. Why is it, exactly, that we find it easier to complain about the stuff that is bothering us than to share the happiness that we feel with others? So here’s my experiment, sharing 15 of my most favorite feelings, and we’ll see how I feel after.

  • When you slowly wake up in the morning without an alarm clock, sunshine softly hitting your face, birds singing outside, and you know- for a brief instant- that you couldn’t be happier than that moment
  • When suddenly things just start going right for you- Ex: Within the last couple of weeks, a stranger gave me a bouquet of roses, I found out I’m moving to DC, and I went to Nashville last weekend for a wedding of one of my favorite people from college. All of these things have contributed to a pleasant happy buzzy feeling that has lifted me up for days. :)
  • When two people are so connected that you feel like you could be the same person
  • When you’re trying to solve a really hard problem, and you have to try lots of different solutions and think critically about how you can solve it- and then you solve it and you get the satisfaction of knowing you figured out a pretty cool solution. I love that.
  • That feeling when you’ve just told someone you love them and like them and they say that they love you and they like you too
  • When you’re reading a book and you’re so into it that you feel like you are the main character
  • Seeing a close friend after being apart for a really long time and reconnecting like the time and space apart never happened
  • Being happy just because your friend is happy. :) I think that is a really undervalued feeling- rejoicing because someone else had something go right for them.
  • Closely related to ^^, being happy for no reason at all
  • Getting a secret out in the open that you’ve deliberately hidden for a long time and you can finally share it with someone and they tell you that they love you and that you’re ok- it’s normal to make mistakes and mess up and be human
  • When someone tells you that they find you attractive- physically or mentally or in whatever fashion- but just that they are attracted to you in that way. That is a pretty powerful feeling.
  • Smelling the first spring flowers that pop out of seemingly nowhere. They’re always so sweet.
  • Smelling my shower gel (Man, I love The Body Shop. I strongly endorse their Lemon and Strawberry flavors.)
  • Starting a new book. I just get so excited to go into another world and escape my reality for a little while :) [A+++++ rating this week for The Selection series by Kiera Cass- I just read the first trilogy of them in about ~12 hours and loved them so much! Many thanks to Sara for the recommendation!]
  • Moving to a new place and seeing who you become in a new situation. I’ve now had a little bit of experience with this, and while there are aspects I dread, I love the idea that- if I wanted- I could reinvent myself a la Gatsby and become a new version of me. I do think I become a new version of me everytime I move and meet new people- but isn’t that what part of what life’s about? Discovering all the sharp edges, the hidden scary bits, the beautiful pieces, and the deep intense feelings that all make you you?

Result: So, at least for me, this wasn’t difficult at all. I liked sharing these feelings with you guys… and even if we had the general public reading our blogs, I wouldn’t care about them learning this stuff about me. Like I said, I feel like this is what being human is about… Of course, I am a generally optimistic and happy, energetic person. What do you guys think? Is it harder for you to share the good rather than the bad?

With love and happy feelings,

Amber

PS- As I mentioned above, I’m really sorry I didn’t get to blog last week… Going down to Nashville on Saturday and then back up Sunday kind of consumed my life. ;) But with lots of fun!

Mumford & Sons- “Believe”
5 Comments
Sara
6/27/2015 11:56:28 am

This was very nice (and you're welcome :D). I wanna hear more about your upcoming move! I like a lot of the happy moments you picked, like seeing friends you haven't in awhile and getting lost in books. I might steal this for my next blog :) (It's not really stealing if it's a theme...)

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Amber
6/28/2015 12:42:50 pm

Yes, there's no problem with "stealing" if it's a theme... Besides, I "stole" it from Hank. ;) I would love to hear some of your favorite feelings too!
And I'll happily tell you guys more about my move... when I have more info, lol. Organizing these things takes time and a lot of effort for sure. Progress!

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Anna Beth
6/28/2015 03:50:08 am

AWWW SQUEEEE! I really like this. I feel all warm and fuzzy inside now. My favorites of your list were the first one about waking up, and also being happy because your friend is happy. You're right--that is underrated! But yeah, I love all of those feelings!
And I think it's easy to complain about stuff because it might make a person feel clever or cool somehow, whereas talking about things that genuinely make them happy might make a person feel more vulnerable. Because that means sharing a part of you that's sort of personal--what YOU personally find joy in--versus complaining about things that are wrong with the world, which is more general, or complaining about another person (tearing them down to build yourself up). Also, if you say you really love something and someone dismisses it or belittles it, that would hurt. I'm not saying any of these feelings are correct or that they apply to me. But I think that's why some people might find it easier to express complaints rather than joy. Personally, yeah, I can see not wanting to have your happiness rejected by another person's comments or something, but I'd much rather share positive things than negative ones...even if I am a bit of a whiner sometimes.
Thanks for a great, positive, and thought-provoking post!

Reply
Amber
6/28/2015 12:40:42 pm

I totally understand what you mean. I may be an optimist, but I complain about stuff a lot of the time too. Probably an interesting point to that is that I actually find myself complaining about things when others are complaining about stuff. It probably comes from that human tendency to want acceptance from others/everyone and to find common ground. Still, I do much prefer sharing joy. :)

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Rachael
6/29/2015 12:42:37 pm

I love this post as well! and I definitely agree with Anna Beth that it gave me the warm fuzzies hehe :)

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