Hello from...I'm lazy and I'm recycling something I wrote recently in my secret blog that none of you know about.
Rapunzel is waiting for her biggest dream to come true, just like all those months ago I waited. Years, really. I waited for my biggest dream—to travel the world—to come true. But unlike Rapunzel, I never worried that it wouldn’t be all I’d hoped for. I knew my semester at Harlaxton would be the most magical time of my life. And it was. It really was.
Nothing compares to the comfort of home, the love of my family, the bond of old friends, or the warmth of a cat on my lap, but the life I led at Harlaxton was like a new world. It was so dissimilar from anything I had ever experienced. I lived in a beautiful old manor house with some of the coolest people I’ve ever met. While I longed for my friends from home to experience it with me, I also made amazing new friends. Deep down, we were all nerds, and we were all ecstatic to be there, living it up and learning together in Europe.
I saw more of the world in 4 months than I had in the past 19 years of my life. England, Scotland, Wales, Ireland, France, and Italy showed me the best of the best, and I can’t wait to revisit them someday.
My parents came at the end of the semester and joined me on one last romp through England and France before we all headed home together. It was wonderful to get to experience Europe with them, especially because they had never dreamed they would get to do that, while I had been not just dreaming of it, but expecting it my entire life.
If I say that, do I sound like a spoiled brat? That’s not the intention. Yes, I had spent almost two decades expecting to go to Europe, to have these adventures. Not in a Daddy-I-want-it-now! kind of way, but in a way that it became more than just a dream; it became a life goal, and I was going to achieve it one way or another. At least that’s what I always told myself, when I really should have been more humble about it, praying that God would send me wherever His will dictated. Either way, God got me to Europe just the same, and I am so thankful that He did! It was one of the biggest blessings of my life, and I will remember it forever.
But now it’s over. One month ago I was in London.
Today I’m in Kentucky.
It’s not that that’s so bad. I love being home, despite the occasional boredom and the looming dread of finding a summer job. It’s just that…I don’t know where I go from here.
Going back to Tangled, Rapunzel asks, “What if it is [all she dreamed it would be]? What do I do then?” And that’s the position I’m in now. Harlaxton was all I dreamed it would be and more, but now that dream is achieved.
Now here’s the part where I stop and try to explain my psyche. There are some people who take so much delight in the little things. They're fascinated with the seemingly unremarkable moments that make life so rich. And while I love those little moments when they happen, I’m the sort of person who needs a bigger dream to move forward. I feel like I constantly need to be propelled toward a great something: a faraway dream, a seemingly impossible plan, a momentous project.
But I don’t know what that is now. And I’m probably wrong to need some great goal to obsess over. God will take care of my life. But I am a dreamer; I love daydreaming about adventures and probabilities. And now, as Flynn Rider says, I “get to go find a new dream.”
I already have some ideas up my sleeve, but ultimately it's up to God's perfect will.
" Many are the plans in the mind of a man, but it is the purpose of the LORD that will stand. " --Proverbs 19:21
Send prayers and wish me luck. I’m finding a new dream. :)
Send prayers and wish me luck. I’m finding a new dream. :)
RSS Feed
